What do you call a skeleton in your closet? Evidence of a brutal crime. You should probably call the cops.

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What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Roses are red, violets are red. Aaaaaahh! My garden's on fire!

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What happens if you drop a baby of a cliff It dies

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HOw do u DEFeat thE hatErsz shitted on em

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You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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You scream I scream We all screamed when the chicken crossed the road

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Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

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Why are gay guys so good at being gay? The black guys told them too.

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who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

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A man walks into a bar... OW!!!

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

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Knock knock. Who's there? Smell mop. Smell mop who? (smell my poo)

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Joker: Knock knock Batman: Who's there Joker: Not your parents

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head and dies.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops