What's the best way to win a race? Run faster than all other participants.

What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

How do you get your sister to stop wearing your underwear? Throw up on her.

When is a door not a door? When it's a pair of titties!

Next Q: What's worse than a bee sting? A: Two bee stings. Q: What's worse than two bee stings? A: Three bee stings. Q: What's worse than three bee stings? A: Sexual assault.

why did the baby fall down the stairs? i pushed it.

Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

What kind of pizzas did they last order at the World Trade Center? Pepperoni

How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

A man on an airplane is extremely frustrated by a small, screaming child. He puts on his headphones and listens to music.

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

What's the difference between Mel Gibson and a pineapple? Well at a molecular level, not much because both are made up of atoms.

Why did the boy run a marathon? because one of his good friends had just earlier passed away from pancreatic cancer and he decided to honor his memory by raising money through a 5k run. His family, friends and acquantances were all very proud of him and decided to hold the charity every year.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A little boy who can't reach the doorbell.

Whats worse than anal sex Anal sex with razor blades

"Torture the orphans as much as you want. Who they gonna tell? Their parents?"

What's worse than being single on Valentine's Day? Finding out your son has AIDS.

A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

Q: whats worse than being in the car for 1hour A: being in the car for 2 hours Made by: grant chapman:)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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