What has 17 eyes, 43 toes, 11 feet and, 9 heads? A 17 eyed- 43 toed- 11 footed- 9 headed monster.

my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

What did the woman get for her 18th birthday? Stabbed to death.

according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

What did Batman say to When they were heading to the Batmobile Robin get in the batmobile.

A man walks into a bar, politely orders one drink, sips it while having social conversations with his peers, pays his tab, and goes to take the bus home. I can respect that.

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side! :)

What did one friend say on his friend's myspace page? You need a Facebook

WNBA

What is worst then 9/11? What? Tiger woods

What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus unable to speak or comprehend the complexities of conversation, does not reply and shits on the floor.

/\ The joke above was really dumb. \/ The joke below is pretty good.

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

two men walk into a bar. they get a concussion.

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

I'm not gay (phrase) - A phrase commonly used by straight men.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a penis and a knife choose which one goes in you.

A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

Your mum is so fat that she finds trouble fitting through thinner doorways

What came first, the chicken or the egg? Well, to tell you the truth, I think that the chick-fa-lea came first.

What's worse than finding a work in your apple? The Holocaust.

why does beyonce sing " to the left, to the left"? - cause black people have no rights

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...