Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

Q: What do you call a dad running down a hill? A: A mom running down a hill, I lied about the dad.

Why did Susie start shaking? She had continuous ceasars

did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks why the long face? The horse, unable to comprehend human speech, promptly craps on the floor and leaves.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the first monkey? why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure.

What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

Hey girl, do you have a mirror in your pocket? Because I dropped one and I can't find it.

How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

Why was Dr Who unable to travel back in time using the TARDIS? Because it's just a television prop. It isn't a real time machine.

two tomatoes are running and one stops to tie its shoe and the other says "Catch up!" This begins to put the first tomato on the spot and he runs after the second tomato without finishing his shoe and he trips falls and dies of severe brain damage

Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

Tool will release their 5th album this summer.

What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

What was going through the minds of the Sandy Hook victims? Bullets.

What do you call a black guy holding a crate of watermelons? a farmer

Abbie im pretty sure your birth certificate is an apology from the condom factory

WARNING!: THIS JOKE MAY BE OFFENSIVE::: three mexicans wanted to cross the united states borders when they were greeted by a border guard with a gun. the guard tells the three mexicans that if they wanted to pass the border, they will have to do as he says, to which the 3 of them agrees. the guard tells them to go gather a pair of fruits, so like that each of them went their own way to go get some fruits. the first mexican came back with a pair of apples. The guard orders him to stick both of them up his ass and if he makes a sound, the guard will kill him. The mexican obeys and sticks the apple halfway when he screamed. the guard killed him. The second mexican came back with a pair of cherries. The guard ordered the same thing and told him the same thing. the second mexican made 1 cherry and a half when he giggled. So he died also. when he got to heaven, he meets the first mexican. to which the 1st mexican asks, "why did you laugh? that was so easy!" and the 2nd mexican responded, "i giggled because i saw the third mexican coming with a pair of water melons."

Why was the black guy running away with a sack full of money? He was rushing to local charity to donate the money. It was closing in 2 minutes.

A man walks into a bar the bartender looks at the man and says "Hey son you wanna make one hundred bucks?" the man looks at the bartender and says "Im not your son."

Santa isn't real

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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