Knock knock Who's there? (Punch the listner in the face)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A father and son get into a car crash. They go to the hospital and both the father and son are unconsciuos. The doctor comes in to the son's room and says, "I can't operate on this boy, he is my son. How could this happen if the dad is knocked out? It was a gay couple.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The man decides to jump off the bridge and decides to make one last phone call. "Hello, Jane, this is Doug. I just wanted to let you know, from the bottom of my heart, that I love you." Person on the phone says "This is not Jane, this is Joe." "Oh, hi, Joe. Could you just tell your wife what I said. Bye." The man continues to jump down the bridge and swims with his beautiful girlfriend. They all had a great day.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a book of notes? A notebook.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really angry. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds and it better be there!!" The next morning he got up early and told his wife to come to the driveway. He quickly pulled out a .44 Magnum and murdered her violently. The marriage had been a nightmare ever since they lost their unborn child, and the situation pushed Bob to a place, where he could no longer look at his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How did Goku save his home planet? He didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Oh look, a dead guy. He must have died

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A small plane is flying across the Atlantic Ocean, on board there's a Black Guy, a Jew, a Priest, and a Mexican. The plane has engine failure and needs to crash, but luckily there are enough parachutes for everyone. The evacuation is succesful.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How many kids does Buzz Light Year have? To infinity and beyond!!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q. What did the dog say to the cat? A. Ruff.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why was the man at the tuna fish factory mad? because he was going through intense emotional trauma happening in his life because of problems with his wife and child.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black man and two Mexican men are all in the same car, who's driving? One of the Mexicans.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Have you ever seen what Stevie Wonder looks like without his sunglasses? Neither have I.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I remember the last words my Grandfather said before he kicked the bucket: "Hey, how far do you think I can kick this bucket?"

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was little Jessica missing?? She was stuck in the freezer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats do dinosaurs and people have in common? one of them is extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests Testicals

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happenend after the chicken tried to cross the road? a KFC opend

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Dear 6, Please stop spreading rumors about me. I heard you do some pretty nasty things with 9. Sincerely, 7

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why did the Jew not attend school ? because he was 27

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why couldn't the Indian kid read? He got shot in the eye.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops