Why did Devon move out of his mom's house? His mom beats him.

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A horse walks into a bar, and a man says "Hey, why the long face?" The horse calmly turns to him and replies, "Because I'm a horse you drunk moron."

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Why didn't the blond cry at her child's funeral? She died, too. It was a terrible accident.

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What do cows in Africa say? Moo

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Once upon a time, A lonely man was living in the woods. He died of exhaustion, dehydration, starvation, and bacterial infection. The end. Once upon a time, Another lonely man was living in the woods. He built a house, made a well, made a farm, got married, had kids, and had a wonderful life. The end.

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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Why'd the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a bus.

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carn ehney bodie hellp mie with mine smellings?

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A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doc, I blacked out last night and have a sore ass." The doctor took some x-rays and informed him he had colon cancer.

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roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

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Q: How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? A: That's not funny.

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-how many potatoes are in a sack -5

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Knock Knock Who did that?

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3 Chinese brothers (chu, bu, and fu) come to America and want to change there names. Chu becomes Chuck, Bu becomes Buck, and Fu becomes Tom because obscenities do not make acceptable names.

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Why did the woman accuse a black man of stealing from a bank? Because she was eating a cornmuffin on the bench across the street when she saw a black man,stealing money from a bank

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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What did the old man catch at a baseball game? Aids.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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A squirrel and an owl are sitting in a tree. The squirrel turns to the owl and says nothing, because it is a squirrel and squirrels can't talk. The owl turns to the squirrel and eats it, because it is a bird of prey.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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