What did the anorexic girl say to the skilled psychologist? Fuck off you'll never understand me.

i tell you whats funny......... what? a fat sudanese man

I thought we where okay, you seemed so nice and calm before, are you okay? What happened?

Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's me, Jeremy. Oh, great to see you! Come inside. They then have a great time watching TV and eating snacks

The indistinguishable bug corrupts a bond arrow.

What happen's when you give an alcoholic whiskey? He's an alcoholic, so he drinks it.

What's harder than steel? Beating Tetris. What's harder than diamond? Beating Tetris...

how do you make abus driver cry? you rip his limbs off.

What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

What do you get if you cross a motorway with a lawnmower? Killed.

What do you get when you post the same thing a million times? Hate

How do you spell eight? 8

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because having no sense of hearing or vision she is completely incapable of operating any sort of machinery.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

Why did priences Dian cross the street? Cause she wasn't wearing a seatbelt!!

You come home and find your family dead. What do you do? Take a picture, post it on facebook

A seal walks into a club, It proceeds to maul customers and then makes its way back to the ocean where it lives.

Tool will release their 5th album this summer.

Why did the Wife cheat on her Husband? Because she was a f***ing BITCH.

Q: How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Well considering the weight of a fly is 1.2 grams, and the weight of a light bulb is 50 grams (and this is assuming that the fly can lift its own body weight) it would take 41.6 flies. But also considering the fact, that the .6th of a fly is impossible, because it is more than likely to be deceased, it is impossible for flies to screw in a light bulb.

What do you call a fly without wings? A rather unfortunate physical disability

A fat guy, well over 300 lbs, goes to KFC and orders a big bucket of chicken. He gets his bucket of chicken and goes to sit down on a table to eat his chicken. A man walks up to him and asks him "are you going to share any of that chicken?" The man says "no."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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