An alien spacecraft picks up human transmissions from Earth. They continue on in silence and disgust.

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Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

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Women are like fish. It's hard to tell when they are crying underwater.

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How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.

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Wanna know what is gross? a dead baby in a dumpster. Grosser? Ten dead babies in a dumpster. Grosser? There is a live one at the bottom. Grosser? It ate its way out. Grosser? It came back for seconds.

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What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

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How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

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How did Jimmy get into the R movie? He bought a ticket.

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Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

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a dog and a duck went out for a meal they both ordered lobster and enjoyed the night.

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was trying to kill himself in the fastest and easiest way due to his drinking problems, which in the first place separated him him from his wife, who is fighting with him in court for custody of there only child ,Steven. He can not even pay the rent on his apartment or hold a job to pay child support..he is also in debt.

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the joke below will not be as funny as this one.... hahaha other joke i just ruined you

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I'm a little teapot, short and stout. Here is my handle, here is my spout. When I get all steamed up here me shout: Absolutely nothing because I'm a teapot you maniacal psychopath.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Nobody know he couldn't open it.

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If you're paddling upstream in a canoe and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes fit in a doghouse? None! Ice cream doesn't have bones!

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Billy Mays and Michael Jackson are up in Heaven, because they died recently.

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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What's black on bottom and white on top?? Society

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Q: whats worse than finding a worm in your apple A: the holocaust

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arena football

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What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

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Why did the mentally disabled child begin to cry? Because he shit himself

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ada! Ada who? Ada burger for lunch!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops