What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

What did the hispanic man say to the black man? I don't know, if I was listening to their conversation, the would be creepy.

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

So there's this big ass moose, and he walks into this grocery store, & asks the cashier "which isle are the potatoes in?" the lady replies, "down isle 5." so the moose walks down to isle 5 and there weren't any potatoes!

How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

whats worse than 911 nothing you cant beat 911that sucked

Roses are red, violets are blue, f*** you, f*** you.

Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

What do you call a black person born in America? American.

why did katy fall off her bike?

What's the difference between and indian man and a barstool....... indians walked on the moon with a cow named chester.

Marilyn Manson was walking to church.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS now so do you.

INSULT- You've got a photographic memory, but the lens cap is on. INSULT- Whatever anyone says to you goes in one ear and out the other because nothing is blocking traffic INSULT- I heard you were born, your father threw rocks at the stork. From- Insults and Putdowns lite

why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

Q.What do you call a beaver with a unibrow. A. A beaver........it's still a beaver

Why did Sidney drop her ice cream? A refrigerator fell on er

There are two muffins in the oven. One says: "It's really getting hot in here!" The other one can't reply because it is already dead.

I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

whats black and white with red all over. something that's black and white with red all over.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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