Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? Ones fun to jump on, the others just a trampoline.

I just flew in from Chicago and boy are my legs cramped

Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

A man says to a woman, "hey, bitch, shut your fucking mouth you goddamn hooker." Most hookers are used to it.

The doctor asks the patient how he's doing, the patient says fine. The doctor says "that's weird cause you have leukemia."

A man walks into a bar and walks up to the counter. The bartender looks the man up and down and asks "Can I help you?" "Ya, get this guy off my ass" the duck promptly replies.

Why didn't the boy get any presents for christmas ? Because sadly his father is an alcoholic and cant support him nor his family.

Why do people always walk so slow when your in a rush to get somewhere? They don't it just seems like that

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Not doing your Webtime on a Friday!!

"My foot is killing me" "no, actually it's that noose around your neck"

How did the girl get hit by a car? Better question, How did the car get in the kitchen?

What do you call a hispanic and black man flying a plane? A pilot and his co-pilot.

A man and two women walk into the a house. When they leave out come 2 babies with them. What happened in that house? They were babysitting.

SCUBA is spelt S C U B A

Gianni

knock knock who's there Scott, Scott who, Scott Rollheiser stole my joke and posted it here.

whats worse than stubbing your toe? getting a vanarial disease and going insane

What did the black kid call the white kid? His name...

It's Adam and Eve, not Steve and Eve!

Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh damn I'm blind.

If you added up all of the grains of sand in all the beaches of the world, how many would there be? Anyone?

A Jewish guy walked into a bar... and said "ow"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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