What happened to the little boys house? It burned down. How did the boy die? In the fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

what did the blind man say as he past the fish market? he asked one of the fisherman if they had any fresh catch that day and bout three tuna steaks for his wife and son

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its dopaminergic neurons fired synchronously across the synapses of its caudate nucleus, triggering motor contractions propelling the organism forward, while emitting 'cluck' distress signals, to a goal predetermined by its hippocampal road mappings.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Guess what? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

You can buy me a rose, and if I love roses, that rose would make me happy, you can buy me a large house by the ocean, but if I do not like big empty spaces and dislike the sea, it would make me sad. I am no longer sure what would make me happy, so no.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

When the clock strikes the bell at elephantasourous during my erectionn i screw myself CC

thumb_up thumb_down +23

hihihihihihihihihihiihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihihjhihhhihhihihihihihihiihihihihihihihihihihihihiihihiihihihihihihihihihihiihihihihiihihihi

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's yellow and can't Swim? A bulldozer

thumb_up thumb_down +23

A man is training his dog. He tells the dog to sit. The dog sits. "Good boy!" said the man. The dog did not thank the man for the compliment because dogs cannot speak.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but I'm your stalker, welcome to my deserted warehouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

F U C K Y O U W I T H Y O U R A N T I J O K E S

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What's worse that finding a worm in your apple? Half the holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why are we on a roof? Becuse some idiot gave us all roofies.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did Billy want cancer? So he could be like his parents.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What is grey and smells like sand? A Rock.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

How do you wake up your snoring friend? Cut his feet off.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do people in Asia do for black history month? Nothing, black history month is an American thing.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the Jew pick up the penny? Because he dropped it

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black hitch-hiker? Stranded

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops