Roses are red, Violets are blue, I don't have cancer, but you do. Love, your doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is black and white and green and red and purple and orange and magenta and brown and yellow all at the same time? Can you tell me? Cause I've got no clue.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What do you get when you cross an octopus with a camel? Nothing, inter-species breeding is impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What's the easiest way to kill a blond? You stab her.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

What did the 85 year old man do after having the sex of his life? He found out he had AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats Funnier than 24?........ 25

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock, knock. Who's there? No one. You have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

WALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXTWALLOFTEXT

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two men are sitting in a bar. They finish their drinks and pay the bill before leaving.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Pavel Novak

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What is brown and smells? Poop

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a supporter of Barrack Obama? A welfare recipient

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's worse than a baby in a car accident? The baby survives and has a mental problem, grows up, and then drives the same car and gets in another accident.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the fish bite the house? Because he wanted to eat the house

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Did you know it is impossible to say "Good eye might" and not sound Australian...

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A van drives into a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Cry me a river. then try and build a bridge, fail, and walk away frustrated

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A UNIX guru walks in to a restaurant and asks for day's special. Waiter responds "tartar steak." UNIX guru thinks that "steak.tar.tar just doesn't make any sense" and responds "I'll just have tar steak."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why is there velcro on the edge of the table. Because its there to hold the microwave.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the ckicken cross the road? to kiss my ass

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What did the pig say after having sex? "Oink".

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Hey I just met you,and this is crazy,please stand up,if you're the real slim shady.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops