What did the man say to the other man? I am unsure of what he said, but it seemed like a pretty nice conversation until one of the men got hit by a elephant.

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What is bad about being black and Jewish? Your gonna have to sit in the back of the oven

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What's worse than having a friend in a car accident? Laughing at their funeral.

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An underaged man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, but the bartender says we don't serve minors. The boy then rushes out if the bar for fear of being caught.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids jumping your fence and stealing your lemons? Molest them.

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What did the Chinese restaurants do with dogs that wander into the kitchen? Kept them as pets.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bartender says nothing. He was a mute.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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Lets go Detroit Pistons!

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How do you make a Fireman cry? You kill his family in a fire.

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Q: How much does a hipster weigh? A: It varies largely by hipster, the same way it does with any other person.

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walks briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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Why did the panda fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second panda fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first panda. Why did the third panda fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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what do a dog and tree have in common? nobody cares when they die

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and smell

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What did the man do at the "take a penny leave a penny holder" He took a penny, and left a penny.

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throbbing slobber

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What is wrong with racism? A lot of things.

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drugs.

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Q:What time is it when you have to go to the dentist? A: It varies. But most dental offices are open for service between 8am and 4pm

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

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Why do you bury an Asian on the side of a hill? Because he's dead.

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Q. WHAT IS SPECIAL ABOUT GEORGE BUSH? A. NOTHING

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A Jew picked up a penny. He thought his beard matched the guy on the coin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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