3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

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What did the black man do in the Italian Pub? He gave a 20% tip and couldn't have been more courteous.

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A farmer has 17 sheep standing in a field and all but 9 drop down and die. How many sheep are left? It doesn't matter. A CIA sniper guns the farmer down, along with his family and the remaining sheep. The other agents move in and remove all evidence that the government is experimenting with a new nerve agent.

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what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Whats the worst way to find out your married. Hungover

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Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

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What do blueberries, oranges, watermelons, doors, curtains, backpacks, spoons, asian men, bicycles, asian men on bicycles, shrimp, books, eagles, dinosaurs, watermelons wearing backpacks filled with shrimp and orange spoons, feet, limes, binders, paper, candles, chicken nuggets, tvs, chairs, floors, refridgerators, and humidifiers have in common? Barnes and Noble

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know... I thought no one knew the answer to that question...

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala.

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What is the worst place to be in race if you're racing with me Behind me

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Sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

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Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men? A. He thought it was a home delivery service.

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why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

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How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

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A duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves the duck the beer. Later, the bartender wonders to himself when his life got so out of control.

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Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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If the Earth is square, why are trees smart? because you touch yourself at night

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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