Which came first the egg or the chicken? The chicken because eggs can't cross the road

Runescape.

i love u. so rate me good or i will talk to my lawyer. nothing personal, i just have no arms, legs, or nose and got broken up with by a girlfriend yesterday (and no, she was not fake) Her name was maria. On the bright side, my grandma woke up this morning!

what's the difference between natives and dogs? people enjoy having dogs in their houses

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? It's a meaningless question because animals had been creating eggs for millions of years before chickens ever evolved.

Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

Why did the blonde fall down? She got shot in the head.

Kid 1: "Want a Hurts Doughnut?" Kid 2: "Umm... sure." Kid 1 opens up a box of freshly baked Hurts doughnut from Hurts Bakery and gives one to kid 2

What do you call a black man on the side of the road? -A black man who needs a ride.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Cheese.

Why was the asian boy get straight A's? He paid attention during class, took good notes, studied at home, and had a personal drive that lead him to be a good student.

Q. What's silver and cries? A. Someone who's been stabbed while wearing a suit of armour.

Why was the old lady hard of hearing? She spent many of her young days blasting hard rock from her speakers/

What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Nothing, he's the same person

Whats orange and has stripes? - a tiger

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

I went to the store and I fell

Why can't Jay cut his hair? Because he has AIDS

Your Mama is so old, that she is probrably going to die pretty soon.

Two muffins are in an oven. One says "It's getting hot in here". The other one starts to reply but then it's internal organs burst from the heat.

Roses are red It's 4 in the morning I have full blown aids I'm going to bed now, this is boring

My dog has no nose." "How does it smell?" "Potato"

Wanna hear a joke? Sure. Too bad I don't have one.

A black, asian, and white guy jump off a building, who lands first? Well, according to newton's law of gravitation every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. It depends on who weighs the most

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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