Roses are red Violets are red Trees are red Shrubs are red HOLY SHIT! MY YARD IS ON FIRE!

Why did the old woman put roller skates on her rocking chair? She had dementia.

The NBA lockout

What do you call an animal who is purple and feeds on grass? Well his name is Timmy, he is a 6 year old boy and has been diagnosed with a rare deadly disease that turns his skin purple and has removed him so far from reality that he has begin to feed on his front lawn.

a Jew had a small nose

What did the man say to the attractive female bartender as he left the bar? Well, it's been fun but I hate you so I'm leaving to kill your entire family.

Why did the blonde kid lose the spelling bee? Because she misspelled a word.

It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

A blind man walks into a bar and a table and a lady....

There was a Mexican in a bomb shop ?

If thin people skinny dip, what do fat people do? Sink

A dog walks into a bar, looks at the bartender, lifts its leg and pisses on a bar stool. What does the bartender do ? He chases the dog out the bar and gets a mop to mop up the piss.

Whats worse than the holocaust? A n a l

Q: Why MohammadReza Is a Bitch? A: Because he isnt a whore

my bubbles!

Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yea, let's go bury it!"

Why did the chiken cross the road. Anwer: because it was being chased by a crazy horny/ kinky redneck.

how many babies does it take to paint a wall red? depends on how hard you throw em

your momma's so stupid she shot herself

what is brown with wheels? a potatoe, i was just kidding about the wheels

What can be any colour and is made of leather? Cars. I lied about the leather part.

Q: What do you call a bathtub? A: A bathtub

What's red and spins real fast? Not a dead baby in a blender, babies can't fit in there. Unless of course you dismember them. but that's obsurd. . . Kinda

Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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