Yo mama so fat, that she feels uncomfortable in a bathing suit.

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What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

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Things to do get an A on my test win my hockey game become immortal well that escalated quickly

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what did the surfer do on his computer? browse the internet

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That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

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The man asks the blind man "where ya going"b The Blind man replies "i dont know".

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How do you attach a nipple tassle to a purple honey badger? Refridgerator

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I drink poodle juice for breakfast lunch and dinner I was then turned into a tree

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What goes up but never comes down? This dick

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Roses are red violets are blue I'm black give me money

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Justin Bieber

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Roses are red, Facebook is blue, no mutual friends, WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?

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Ha-Ha! Well now, we call this the act of mating But there are several other very important differences Between human beings and animals that you should know about I'd appreciate your input Sweat baby sweat baby sex is a Texas drought Me and you do the kind of stuff that only Prince would sing about So put your hands down my pants and I'll bet you'll feel nuts Yes I'm Siskel, yes I'm Ebert and you're getting two thumbs up You've had enough of two-hand touch you want it rough you're out of bounds I want you smothered want you covered like my Waffle House hashbrowns Come quicker than FedEx never reach an apex just like Coca-Cola stock you are inclined To make me rise an hour early just like Daylight Savings Time Do it now You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Do it again now You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Gettin' horny now Love the kind you clean up with a mop and bucket Like the lost catacombs of Egypt only God knows where we stuck it Hieroglyphics? Let me be Pacific I wanna be down in your South Seas But I got this notion that the motion of your ocean means "Small Craft Advisory" So if I capsize on your thighs high tide, B-5 you sunk my battleship Please turn me on I'm Mister Coffee with an automatic drip So show me yours I'll show you mine "Tool Time" you'll Lovett just like Lyle And then we'll do it doggy style so we can both watch "X-Files" Do it now You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Do it again now You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Gettin' horny now You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Do it again now You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Do it now You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Do it again now You and me baby ain't nothin' but mammals So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel Gettin' horny now

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One day a man walked into a wall

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dead dibbs

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why did the cow say "moo"? because he's a cow and that's what cows say.

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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So a man is in a car smoking weed when he forgets to crack a window so he over doses and dies. The car crashes and he kills 3 other people.

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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Why is a Wesley a black man ? He licks tuna

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Why did Jane get pregnant Because she bought a man's semen and put it in her vagina.

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Saggy Nipples By chan chan

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Q: what's blue and kills you when it falls from the sky? A: a whale no shit

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Ask me if I'm a rock. Are you a rock? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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