What do George Washington, JFK and Hillary Clinton have in common? They've never been to my house.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

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Why did the boy get hit by the bus? He didn't check both sides before crossing

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bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

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theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

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Q: what is long hard and full of seamen A: a submarine

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Agent 47.

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So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have AIDS go get checked

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When is a door not a door? Never, a door is an inanimate object and is thus incapable of transforming.

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Your face is hilarious.

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Have you ever tripped over a leaf? No. Neither have I.

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Wanna hear a clean joke? I took a bath with bubbles. Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is the girl next door.

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What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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I`m not as random as you think i`m salad.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock.. Whose there? Not Sara

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was making a suicide attempt.

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whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

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what does a gay horse eat heeyyyyy

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It was a dark and stormy night. The whole family waiting for the phone to ring as they await for a criminal to give instructions. Then the phone rings... RING RING Jeffery: "Hello? Yes, sir. Yes, sir. No sir please don't! No, have mercy! Yes sir. No sir, no. Yes sir. Bye." Donald: "What did the man say?" Jeffery: "Wrong number..."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops