How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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What do you call a cow that's holy? Holy Cow

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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find the mistake in this sentence: Sadam Hussein: "hello" mistake: Sadam Hussein said hello!

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Where do dizzy cows go? In circles...

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what leaves a bigger memory than a passionate kiss? A STAB WOUND!

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What squirts out of your butt and runs down your leg? Bloody diarrhea.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Um no horses are overrated.

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What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

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Knock knock Who's there? What are you, blind?

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If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

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Why did the black man go to jail? Because he committed a criminal offense.

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

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There are two muffins in an oven neither can say anything at the moment, however, because both are in excruciating pain.

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What did the robot say to the child? Nothing, he malfunctioned and strangled him. Despite the authorities best efforts to free the kid, he was still strangled because robots are really strong. After killing the boy, the robot self destructed and leveled 5 city blocks everyone within the vicinity was killed.

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yo mamas so dumb she named her house butt and her son crack and then she called the police saying I looked all over my butt and i can not find my crack.

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A man walks into a bar and says to the bartender "Hey, 2 beers please" The bartender asks why he is ordering two, as he is alone. The man replies "There is a taxi waiting for me outside."

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a man about 65 years old is tired with his life. he begins to realize that it is meaningless to him. whil on his way to commit suicide, he comes across a man with a magicul offer. the magical man is offering to grant him the power to fly. although, the magical man wants something in return. the 65 year old man, says to himself, "i have nothing to lose". so he gives the magical man all his money and possesions he has with him. with a flick of his wrist, the magical man says, "ok, you have now been granted the power to fly". the 65 year old man, overjoyed of how he has the ability to fly runs to the nearest cliff and jumps. too bad the magical man was really male prostitute broke out of money and tricked the 65 year old man into beleiving that he had magical powers to grant him the power to fly. the 65 yeard old man died from impact and the male prostitute walked away with a wallet full of money.

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What did the Mexican guy say to the black guy? What? Nothing, he don't speak English

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What do you get if you put 2 Korea, 2 Europeans and 2 North Americans together? TSM

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A black guy walks into a basketball court.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Imaj. Imaj who? Haha, you're a Jew.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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