Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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Tiger Woods isn't a Tiger, He's a lion cheeta.

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What did Ben's Graandma get him for Christmas? Nothing, she died on Thanksgiving!

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How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A shitload! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair.)

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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Knock Knock Whos there? The Police, your mother just died of bowel cancer.

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do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

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Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

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Roses are blue Violets are green I have issues, What should I do?

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed 1 fell off and broke it's skull. Momma told the doctor and the doctor said,"Your a bad mom."

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Hi

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Why did the Mexican get arrested? Because he crossed the border.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? Dyphis, say goodbye to your kids.

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Why are you looking here? The joke's in your hand.

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Bartender: What are you having? Sally: Can I have a martini? Bartender: How do you want it? Sally: I want it tall and black, like my man.

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I have a dig bick . . . . . You have a dirty mind.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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Why did the monkey fall off the tree? It died.

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Do dead Elves know it's Xmas ?

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Why did 16-year-old girl scream in the basement? She was being raped.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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I treat women like I treat dead bodies. With respect.

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angelosnyder is not gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops