violets are red my name is bob this poem makes no sense microwave

thumb_up thumb_down +24

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a fat kid? I don't know...you tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

thumb_up thumb_down +24

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What did the rug say to the floor? I got you covered

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's worse than a dead baby inside a microwave? A microwave inside a dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the boy get and iphone? It was his birthday

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is a Mexican's favorite restaurant? While the term "Mexican" encompasses a wide range of individuals and individual predilections, the most common cibarious preference would likely be a food that is reminiscent of his or her homeland; that is, what we refer to as Mexican food. An authentic nearby joint sporting such provisions would likely be the most common preference, but, as this description can only be traced on the local scale, a specific restaurant that covers a wider range of locations would be a more appropriate answer. Among the top choices are Taco Time and Taco Del Mar.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +22

We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was Sally crying because a flock Of seagulls just took a shit in her head

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What is worse than stubbing your toe. Being shot

thumb_up thumb_down +22

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A man walks into a bar. Ouch

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: How do you stop a baby from crying? A: You hit it with brick.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

thumb_up thumb_down +22

why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

thumb_up thumb_down +20

YOU

thumb_up thumb_down +20

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops