Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

Q:Why did the boy cry? A: because his mom was hit by a bus Q: why did the boy wipe his face? A:he was covered in his mother blood and threatened all the witness who saw him push his mother into the bus

What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

Tic tac toe. I never met my father

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

How to condom style ayyyyyy sexy horsey how how how how how to condom style

roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Me. May I come in?" "Yes, you may."

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

Why did the plane crash? Because something was wrong with the engine

Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

Why did the cookie die Because a fat kid was hungry

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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