What do you call a partially deaf obese man? Anything you want, it's unlikely that he'll hear you. If he does manage to catch what you said, your chances of outrunning him are very good considering that he's likely to tire before you, unless you're overweight yourself of course. If this is the case then perhaps you should hit the gym, obesity is a growing problem in the Western world and greatly increases your chance of heart disease and/or diabetes.

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Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

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Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

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What is funny about 9/11. Nothing you sicko, it was a tragic day for the world.

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What do you call a room with a white man a black man and a hot pocket? A reasonable meal

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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A black and a mexican jump off a building, What a tragedy...

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why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

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Safe sex MR

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why do girraffe's have long necks? because my foot is so far up all their asses that it hits their head, pushing it away from the body.

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black people

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a jew walks out of a furnace

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Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

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Your mom as so fat that I'm gonna give you the name of this doctor because I really care for you...... And don't want to see you so stressed because she is so fat.

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

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Why did the boy eat the apple. He really likes apples.

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a man walks in to a bar. he says oww.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

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Why do women fake orgasms? Because they want to give men the impression that they have climaxed.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops