Moo! I'm a goat!

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why did the asian kid do well on his math test because he studied

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How do you get your children out of a cardboard box? You open the box to see your dead children's corpses

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What was unprecedented about Roosevelt running for president in 1940? He had polio, he couldn't run!

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why was the blind man walking in circles? i dont know ask him yourself.

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What does a Jewish man do when he sees a new car? Doesn't buy it because he puts his money in a fund.

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why did the dog bark at the picture because it was ugly

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whats white and looks like paper paper

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Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

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This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

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Why are the Jamaicans in the kitchen? because they are bad men

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the man was talking to a phone no answered cause he talking to a brick wall

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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(SPOILER ALERT) The following are a few punchlines: "I didn't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!" "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks!" "Hold on buddy, I'm about to save you $10,000" "To get to the other side!" "Because 7, 8, 9!" "She had no arms!" "A fridge!" "I don't have Ferrari in my garage!" "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!" "And if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!" "It was stapled to the chicken!" "I proved it to him." "The holocaust" "Red paint" "A stick." "I wished for a big orange head." "No." "A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being." "A pilot." "The papa tomato steps on him and says ketchup." "You left your engine running!" "That's what she said." "TV watches you!" "I think so Brain, but where will we get that many cucumbers at this time of night?" "Rectum? Damn near killed him!" "One but it takes two episodes and the bald guy dies."

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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A young child drops his ice cream and began to cry. Why are you crying asks his mother Because I dropped my ice cream said the child

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What's better then petting a lion? Petting a lion and not getting eaten

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I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

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Q-why did the dog run away? A-he was Michael vick's dog

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balls

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roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

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XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

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How much money did the pirate pay for his ear to get pierced? Nothing, given that he is a pirate. It was probably done at gunpoint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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