Why was the blonde fired from her job as a nurse? Because she ate all the babies in the nursery (She didn't even leave one for the director of the hospital to eat!)

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Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

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Why did Jimmy through a glass at spouse? Jimmy was an abusive husband who had a tendancy to drink too much.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue when I saw you what the heel are you

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Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

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bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

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what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

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What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

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Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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Knock Knock… Who is there? Orange. Orange Who? Orange you glad I didn't say banana? Actually I really wish you did, because I am Hypokalemic and am about to die you asshole.

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Moo! I'm a goat!

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A man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun. Then he returns it and leaves.

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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Women's rights.

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TIMMAH!

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How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

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I'M THE GRAPIST!! I'M GONNA GRAPE UR MOM AND UR DAD AND UR WHOLE FAMILY!!!

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How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

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what the difference between a kettle with a fever and a wooden mallet? I don't remember how the joke ends but your mothers a whore

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

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irish wristwatch JLR

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What's worse than finding a bone in your boneless chicken meal? Going home to find your entire family brutally murdered.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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