Why did the girl kill herself? she was depressed.

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If you work at Penn State you might want to skip the annual "bring your kid to work day"

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What's harder nailing 10 babies to 1 tree... Or nailing 1 baby to 10 trees???

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knock, knock! No answer, they probably can't hear you, use the doorbell.

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? Dogs taste better in stews.

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Where's Waldo? The cemetery, he died last week.

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What do you call a pig and a ball when u come across both of them? A ball hog!

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Hi

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What do you call a stupid anti-joke? Stupid.

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what do you call a man with no friends? it's because of all the wear and tear that's done to the socks being thrown in her, and she desanitizes only the nun with no forebeard

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

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There were once three bears who lived in a cottage in the forest. They left to go to the market one day. While they were gone a blonde girl walked into their cabin. Meanwhile at the market, everyone was freaking out that there were bears there.

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What do Michael Jackson and your family have in common? They're both dead.

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A thin man walks into a Grocery Store. He trips, hits his head and is killed instantly. There are several children present and they are scarred for life.

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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Tell my wife I died doing what I love... Not her

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Why does one not simply walk into Mordor? Mordor doesn't really exist and thus is physically impossible to walk into, or enter by any means really.

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What did Tim say about his wife cheating on him with his best friend's wife? He ran to R Kelly and got peed on.

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John Stamos.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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why did the blond walk in to a door because she was not paying attention

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Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. These are facts. Good day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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