How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

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Why was the black guy good at basketball? He practiced hard everyday.

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Diana and victoria

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if i'm white and you're white, then who took my car keys?

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A horse walked into a bar, broke its leg and its owner then had to put it down because it was a racing horse and the owner did not have enough money to bring the horse back to health. Fuck you.

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What's yellow and has six legs ? A cat. I may be wrong about the color and the legs, I'm color-blind and I can't count.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

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A man walks into a bar. Itwas an metal bar so the man was hurt.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the soan of 5 hours.

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3 strangers were locked in a dark room they turned the light on, unlocked the door and proceeded with their day.

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A man cries out to god.. and god doesn't answer.

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Why did Dave buy a playstation? Because he wanted one.

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How many fingers am I holding up? None, my fingers were blown off by a hand grenade.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The pizza guy. Your pizza's here.

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Women are like puzzles. Because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don't

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A blond walks into a bar. She orders a drink.

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A man walked into a bar. It was closed, so I don't see how this was possible.

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what is darker than black?... YOU

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So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

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What's brown? My toilet hahaha

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Q. What's large, solid, and full of veins? A. A man or woman who frequently engages in weightlifting and follows a diet primarily based around high protein and low carbohydrate intake

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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