Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: Boobees

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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Sorry I am like so fucking wasted still, I keep giggling and laughing all of the time.

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Why did billy fall off the sea-saw Because he got kicked in the throat

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A redhead walks into a hairdressing salon and asks to have her hair dyed black due to being a subject of bullying and social rudeness.

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What do you call a stupid anti-joke? Stupid.

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I went river dancing once. I fell in

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It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

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What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

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What did the teacher say to the pupil who was bad at maths? You are bad at maths and will never complete any sum EVER!

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Little Stephanie was up all night on Christmas eve excited for her new bike that Santa was going to bring her. After tossing and turning for what seemed like decades, the sunset finally arose and Stephanie ran down the steps to unwrap her new bike with the family. Immediately after she went down the staircase, she found her parents marinated in their own blood, with knife wounds all around their body.

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What did the doctor say to the little boy? Pull down your pants and cough.

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Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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What's big, brown, and full of crap? A septic tank.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn’t get to cross the road. Halfway through the crossing, it was hit by a car and turned into roadkill. Then a family of black people picked it up and turned it into fried chicken.

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a bald man walks into a hairdressers and demands beans on toast.

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Your mama's so poor, that it's hard for her to pay her bills.

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you know whats better than lemonade? sex

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What happens to men who grow up. They are probably taller

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Whats brown and sticky? Shit.

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What did Bear Grylls say to the dead whale? Mmmm.

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What is the opposite of Obama? Mitt Romney because he his white and a republican so all is good with him.

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2 out of 4 questions. How do you get an elephant in a fridge? Open it, take the girrafe out, put the elephant in, and close it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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