What is another way to call a procrastinator? Avery annoyed and bored child who does not want to do her homework and is looking up many different anti-jokes for a laugh. You know who you are...

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Why couldnt the kid see the pirate movie? Because he didn't have eyes.

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What do you call a blue baby at the bottom of a pool? Dead.

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How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

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What did the blonde get for Christmas? A Brain

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It was nice knowing you Erron, it really was.

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Why cant you find your handle? Because YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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sdasdadasdasd

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Why can't Johnny run? He has no legs.

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting your nipple ripped off by a pair of pliers

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Jewwy Jewstein

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What happened to the boy with AIDS? He died at the age of 12

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John is typing... *2 seconds later" John: Hi

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why do you care?

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Women Sports.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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Breast cancer.

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if you give somebody a dollar and they give you a different dollar you both have a dollar

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a little violence in a relationship doesn't hurt anybody

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When crossing the river, why the old lady die? She was hit by a falling brick that fell from an airplane.

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Why did Martin have to retake his exams? Because Martin is a right royal Dumbass.

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What is the difference between a car and dead babies? The car is legally obtainable by law and can run on gasoline, when dead babies are nonliving humans, and the owner of which would most likely be sent to jail.

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you just contradicted yourself.

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press a,s,d,f,g,h,j,k,l feel like a pianist

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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