A woman who owns a parrot leaves her home, forgetting that a plumber is scheduled to come fix her sink. A few minutes after she leaves, the plumber arrives and knocks on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waits for a minute and, seeing that nobody has come to the door, knocks again. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, a little more loudly, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink!" The plumber waits for a minute and bangs hard on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screams, "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIINK!!!" Just then, the plumber clutches his chest and falls dead to the ground. When the woman returns home, she sees the dead man in front of her door. She opens her door to go to her phone and asks the parrot, "who is it?" The parrot replies, "WHO IS IT?"

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This guy goes to the ball game. He waits in line at the concession stand and gets a footlong hot dog and a giant orange soda. Then he makes his way around to his section of the stadium, and works his way to his seat, which is in the center of the row. Right when he's about to take a bite of his hot dog, when he hears someone in the seats way up behind him yell "Hey! Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, and sets down his giant orange drink, stands up and turns around, scanning the crowd. Eventually he sits back down. He picks up his hot dog, picks up his giant orange drink, and is just about to take a bike when he hears it again, someone way up behind him yelling "Hey! Mike!". So, he sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, and scans the hundreds of faces in the seats behind him. After a while, he sits back down. Then, right when he's about to bite into his hot dog, he hears someone behind him yelling "Mike! Hey, Mike!" He sets down his hot dog, sets down his giant orange drink, stands up, turns around, cups his hands around his mouth and yells as loud as he can, "My name's not Mike!"

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whats worse than hitler? Anti-Jokes By darragh hamilton

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stuarts mum

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roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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how do you find will smith in the snow? with rescue dogs

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whats worse than a dead cat in your apple? a dead baby in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of it coop and there was something shinny on the other side of the street.

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How do you know if a girl is special? If she hates justin bieber, Twilight, and is open to threeways.

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What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

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Why did the girl ask for anal? She didn't. She was raped.

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Do you know the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human, and one is an inanimate object.

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How do you make a Plumber cry? Kill his family.

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S: How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? P: They can chuck wood.

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What does a Jew do when he finds money on the street? He picks it up and is probably happy it was there.

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you and your family will die tonight

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What are vampires favorite drink? Vampires aren't real.

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What looks like a dick? A penis

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a cannibal.

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3 thieves are also murderers and naked at the moment.

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There once was a man from Kentucky...then he raped everyone in sight... THE END

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How do you kill a retard You give em a kinfe and ask who's special

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Why couldn't the boy write his name because he had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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