Why did the father not text back? He died in a car crash

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- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

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Knock Knock Who's there? I'm going to kill your family.

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If life throws you lemons, you might be dislexic

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wanna here an anti joke scroll down

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Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

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Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

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How do we achieve world peace? KILL EVERYBODY. Nobody can fight when they're dead.

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What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

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How do you starve a celebrity? Tell them they're fat.

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What did the left nut say to the right nut? Nothing

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What's black, white, green, red, blue, orange, gray, purple, and yellow? My art project.

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What do the holocaust and 9/11 have in common? They were both terrible tragedies that people will look back upon in sadness for years.

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What do you call a man or woman who has sex, records it on video, and sells the recordings for money? A porn star.

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fack me in the ace! CC

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You know what is better than winning a race in the Special Olympics? Winning two races.

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We are lawyers

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What is better than winning the gold medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded

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what do u call blue fluff? blue fluff

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Darkness Falls Across The Land The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood And Whosoever Shall Be Found Without The Soul For Getting Down Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell The Foulest Stench Is In The Air The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom And Though You Fight To Stay Alive Your Body Starts To Shiver For No Mere Mortal Can Resist The Evil Of The Thriller

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What happens to a warehouse on a full moon? Nothing

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There was an Irishman, an American and a French man standing at a bar. They all ordered drinks and struck up conversation with each other about what they do for a living and their families. They all go home to their partners and have a peaceful nights sleep.

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What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

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A baby boy and a baby girl are much alike they both taste good

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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