Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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What's the difference between uranium and plutonium? Blast radius

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Dead babies.

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Roses are burning, Violets are burning, my house is on fire

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Hey Patrick Yea? I found something funnier then 24 Give to me buddy 25

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I LIKE TURLES.

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Why would anyone try to run from a fight if:Its not the size of the dog in the fight, its the size of the fight in the dog? I wasn't even talking about dogs and fight isn't something in you! Next time, don't listen to your football coach.

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Why do black people love watermelon? It's simply delicious.

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What's the difference between a vegetable and my son? Nothing

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Why did the pie cross the road? I have no idea, why not ask it?

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A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

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Wanna here somethin funny? Nope.avi

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whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? the wheelchair

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minorities

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You know what helps with sholder pain? If you lick my butthole.

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whats worst than reading youtube comments? Panic at the disco

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Women

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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why did i go on the rollercoaster? because there was a muffin on it

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

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person 1-As me if I'm purple... person 2- Are you purple? person 1- no

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Whats black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white, black and white? A Nun falling down stairs

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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