friends are like onions when you chop them up you cry but when you throw them out of a window, you dont

Why did the blonde stare at the juice carton? Because a man was pointing a shotgun at her and would kill her if she didn't do it.

What did the dog say to his owner? Bark.

Rebecca Black just died, she walked into a stadium and was overwhelmed by the amount of seating choices.

Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

I have read and agree to the terms of midget sex service - View Terms of Service

Today's Horoscope for Cancer: You have Cancer.

Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

What do you call a black man that nicks your car? All we can say is that he is called the Nig

Why did the girl cry? She got hit by a bus.

What did the person say to the other person? "Hello."

knock knock come in !

Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

Whats worst than being stuck in a cage with one blonde? Being stuck in a cage with four blondes.

Yesterday, I was assasinated.

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot... are you racist?

2 guys are in a bar joking and having a good time. One guy looks to the other and says, "So...HOWS your wife?" The man replies "...She died in a horrible car accident." The man's friend then says "...I am sorry to hear that.." "Yeah I know I wish that God damn rat wasn't in the road goddamn fucker"

your mom is so rude that she took her t shirt of and her bra of she was not naked how did she get so rude she drank till one brain cell was left

There's this Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher talking about how similar they are.

how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

Have you heard that Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street are gay? If so, than whoever told you may be mentally challenged, Bert & Ernie are both puppets which even though they resemble people with active personalities, they remain puppets and do not have a sexual oreintation.

Something told me to write "vote pancakes" so I wrote "Vote Pancakes" it said it was wrong, and now I know why, capitals.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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