What is green and red all over? A christmas tree that is internally bleading.

Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

oh whatever Greece isn't going to leave the eurozone shut up about it already

Why did Joe not cross the road? Because the Pedestrian Crossing light said not to.

What did Helen Keller name her dog? Phil.

MRCANN YOUR A FUCKIN' CARROT LERN 2 FOCKIN SIT IN YER HOLE YA FUCKIN PLANT

WHYS S AFRAID OF B CAUSE OF SBB

How did i get from Pakistan to Iraq Iran

Why was Rebecca Black beaten with a pole when she sang Friday? It was Saturday

What's the difference between an American and a Russian? One's American and one's Russian.

Where would it be hard to find handicapped parking? At the paralympics.

Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

AND

Why did the chicken cross the road? To reach his desired destination.

women's rights

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

What is older than history?

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

Why did the chicken cross the road. Because the grocery store only sold pork

What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

How do you stop a man from jumping off a building? Push him off a building.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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