The Yak, a long-coated bovine found in the Himalayas, is named for its distinct call, which sounds similar to "yak-yak-yakyak".

Why didn't the boy's parents throw him a birthday party? Because his father is in jail for drug possession and his mother is dead.

Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

why would a man mistake a watermelon for AK-47? i dont know. The man probably has mental issues.

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

A batch of muffins is baking in an oven. One muffin says to another... Oh sorry, scratch that, they can't talk; they're f***ing muffins. (CSC)

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Dead.

Darnell has a 2 ounce gold chain around his neck. Gold is worth $1,639 per ounce. Where did Darnell steal the gold chain from?

"You're not very subtle, are you?" asked Nyacinth of the Prince. "Coo-fif," replied the Prince, a sly smile on his face.

knock knock whose there banana banana who well, since a banana is a fruit and not human, it does not have parents and thus no last name was given to it.

What is brown and sticky? A stick

How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? The kickstand was broken and the child whom of which owned the bicycle no longer had the need for training wheels.

That's illegal What? Your mom

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

Why did the father leave work early on his son's birthday? He was rushed to the hospital after facing a severe heart attack due to a history of cardiovascular disease in his family.

What's funnier than a dead baby? -A dead baby sitting next to a kid with Down Syndrome.

How do you say hooker in Chinese? ?

Your friend is so retarded I am getting a bit worried and his mother should take him to get tested for mental retardation.

why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

What do you call a sausage with no sauce? A giraffe.

Why did the fox cross the road? To chew on the chicken carcass.

-What's sad about four black guys driving off a cliff? -They were my friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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