an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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What did the poor boy get for Christmas? Orphaned.

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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Did you hear Whitney Houston died? Yes.

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If 1+1=2 why does 2+2 not equal 3?

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A man cooks dinner almost every night even though his wife is the better cook, and the man is in charge of the household. Why? Because the man isnt a sexist douchebag.

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Why did Susie fell off the swings? Because she didn't have any arms or legs.

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How do you make asian ice cream you mix it with a textbook

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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Why did the teenager turn in his work on time? He chose not to procrastinate.

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How do you know when it is a Mexican's birthday? They are walking around with "happy birthday" balloons.

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will you like this joke my sources say no

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a guy fell off a roof of a mansion he died his family cried F.Y.I i have Alzheimers toilet monster

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Why do mexicans like tacos? Because tacos are a very well liked food and they happen to taste good

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A guy, arriving at the pearly gates of Heaven, asks St. Peter "Why did I die? Why me." St. Peter replies: "You died the same way everyone does. Lack of oxygen to the brain."

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How do you get a slave to stop screaming from the rope he is hanging on? You stop messing around and you hang him already!

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Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

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A russian, a mexican, and an american are all sitting in a tavern. The russian ordered vodka, the mexican orders tequila, and the american orders a beer. When the waiter arrives, the russian throws his vodka into the air, shoots it, and says "we got too many of those in our country". The mexican tosses up his tequila and says "we got too many of those in our country". The american throws up his beer, shoots the mexican, and says "we got too many of those in our country". And then drinks his beer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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