Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He orders a beer with two cubes of ice. The bartender ask why does he want two cubes of ice. The guy doesn't answer. He finishes his beer and proceeds to go home safely because he was not intoxicated.

Your chicken just went across the road. What does this tell you about the economy?

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

why was it funny that the boy got hairspray for christmas because he had leukemia

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

Why did the car stop working. The owner was unable to pay the outrageous price for gasoline and was forced to ride a bicycle to and fromvwork every day. Over the course of several months without being run, the engine seized and was forever broken.

why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

What were the pilots' of Malaysia Airlines Missing plane favourite programs? Lost...

how much fish could a chicken

What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

What is funnier than 24 69

what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40? A democrat parade.

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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