A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

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hey did you hear about Osama bin laden? He was found by the CIA and killed on account of his atrocious actions.

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A man walked into a bar. I shot him

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John Cena for president

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Why did the cow say moo? Because all cows say moo

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why did the man french kiss the horse? because he was high on l.s.d and confused the horse for an attractive male because he himself was homosexual ps vagina monkeys and chili

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That Rachael chick needs to get back in the kitchen

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A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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What do you call a guy with a bomb strapped to his chest flying a plane? A pilot with a bomb strapped to his chest

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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A black person went into a store and paid full price for his tv

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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what do you say to the preacher when he walks into church? i dont fu***** know, im jewish.

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what is long, white, and used almost everywhere? there are a lot of things that fit this description, so it would be highly illogical to make a guess.

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what did the bannana say to the milk carton. nothing bannanas cant talk and their on the other side of the store

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What was so special about Anna Frank's diary? Nothing. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why did the man write with a pen on paper? Because he was writing a novel.

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Roses are blue Violets are red What happened to the gay man? He listened to Justin Beiber And then was straight

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

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So 185 cowboys walk into a bar and the bartender says "I can't serve 185 cowboys!" The cowboys ask why not and the bartender says "Because that would exceed the legal maximum occupancy of this building."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Nothing.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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