What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

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What did chad do when he found the grape? He ate it.

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Q: What do you call a dad running down a hill? A: A mom running down a hill, I lied about the dad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He was butchered on the farm for chicken fingers.

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Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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Don't quote me on this Nero, but she kinda deserves it, she should know better, its not like you have gotten this far by not knowing your limits, even if you tend to break them way too often. Can you get rid of the hallucinations with your mind alone? If not get to sleep asap! And stay asleep for a month or so, and if they somehow cant feed your system intravenously, they can all get the fuck out of there.

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XD Okay then, just a little and I am not very fond of it, I mean I tried something called tekken but that just made me nauseus. Then I got into some car racing game years ago, RidgeRacer I think, but when I moved the car to the sides, I kinda involuntarily tilted to the sides, and ended up smacking on the ground a couple of times.

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What did the man say while he was in surgery? Nothing, he was in surgery.

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what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Christmas presents.

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Q: What has two legs and is bloody? A: half a cat

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Roses are red, Violets are too. I'm colour blind, It's a very depressing infliction.

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Why did the car fall of the cliff? The dude driving the car was driving recklessly.

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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What's worse than seeing a real joke on this website? Having diarrhea.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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The 70's called. They had the wrong number.

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Why does Chuck Norris always know the time? He bought a fancy new watch.

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So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

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24

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Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

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How many dead babies can you fit in my truck? Thirty-seven and a half;)

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no really what are ur names?

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Why couldn't John ride a bicycle? Because he is a fish.

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When life gives you limes....... first you have some problem and second u throw them at people

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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