An Asian girl is playing with a rubber band. She accidentally slings it into her eye, cries, and receives immediate attention from her mother.

Knock knock. This is a no soliciting residence, and I do not open my door for strangers.

A Jew, a Muslim and a Christian walk into a bar. The Muslim is dissatisfied with the choice of the meeting place since the Islam forbids drinking alcoholic beverages.

Why did the black guy have a nice sterio? He has a well paying job and decided to treat himself.

what is the best way to start a car? put in the key and turn it.

You know whats funny? Matty Broom.

What does one call black men pushing a car up a hill? Black Car. What does one call white men pushing a car up a hill? White Car. What does one call Mexicans pushing a car up a hill? Grand Theft Auto

A guy wants to build his house out of bricks. So, he hires some experts and they build his house with bricks.

You know what's catchy? A cold

Why did the bird lose all of it's feathers? It got cancer.

roses are red FACT violets are blue FACT this ryhm is boring how about you FACT

Q: How many babies does it take to paint a room? A: Depends on how hard you can throw.

What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

What you you call peanut butter on the top of a dog house Peanut butter

why did the 60 year old touch the little boy's penis? because he was a doctor.

Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

What happened to the blond that went to collage? She got her masters degree and became a brain surgeon.

What's worse than someone who thinks Sting is a nice guy? Sting.

Why should you never eat a jellyfish on a Wednesday? Because it will sting you with its poison.

What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? With a blender. How do you get them out again? With Doritos.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some men like Cheese, I have aids.

* anti-punchline

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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