why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the monkey

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A bald guy walks out of a bar Prostate cancer

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Why did Amy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Amy

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what do you call a tall skiny kid with a very big ego autistic

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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Why did the man shoot himself? Because he already shot his wife.

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Roses are red violents are blue I have 5 figures and the middle one is for you

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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I just drank a cola.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Roses are red...

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.........................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................00............................................................................................................................................I..........................................................................................................................................._____....................................................................................................................................................................................................................................

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

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My name is Harry.

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How could you wake up Lady Gaga? poke her face

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So three Jews walk into a Biker Bar. Despite the fact that is was a self-proclaimed "Biker Bar", the group of men inside were in fact rather open-minded, and had no issues with new members. They had a rich conversation, and frequented the bar thereafter.

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whats funnier than a dead musim? a guy who begs a girl to go out with him for 16 hours

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What do you call the man with no arms and no legs? Jeff. Because that's his ****ing name.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't.

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Why was the girl sad on her Birthday? She found out she was adopted.

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Roses are red Violets are blue This doesn't rhyme F*ck it

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What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

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I work at jcpenny

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A schizophrenic walks into a bar. He has dual personalities and does not realize that he has murdered his family.

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Fire is red Water is blue Earth is brown Air is transparent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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