What do you call a boy with no arms? Names.

knock knock get lost!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Why, apples are the optimum environment for the worm species, offering a stable temperature with the efficiency of nutrition and comortable value, therefore in reality finding a worm in your apple is a healthy suggestion that the Global Warming effects on Earth have not yet affected the ever increasing innocent worm population.

How do you get really high at home? You climb a ladder

Q: What's worse than your parents dying in a car crash? A: You were in the backseat and saw your mother plead your father to slit her throat witht he broken glass because her legs were brushed and a windshield wiper was shoved in her kidney. As you stared on in pure horror, your father did as she asked with much contemplation. An ambulance arrives moments later. In the hospital, you tell your dad that you hate him for killing mom. You run away and he dies overnight due to heart failure. Yo suffered paralysis and now and are confined to a wheelchair for the rest of your natural life and are sent away to a born-again foster care home where you are never adopted.

it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

Why didn't the Orphan finish his lemonade. His legs got chopped off.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

HAHAHAHAH Shut up Andra no one likes you

What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

What did the hispanic man say to the black man? I don't know, if I was listening to their conversation, the would be creepy.

A Jewish man gets on a train. He sits down and a hour and a half later he is dropped of at his proper destination.

Why did the tortoise cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why is this room orange? Because I painted it orange. You didn't paint it; my mom painted it.

What happens when a jew with a boner runs into a wall? He hurts his face.

You're so gay that you lost your virginity to someone of the same gender.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Hitler arrives at his neighbor's barmitzfah... fashionably late.

whats purple and has legs? Nothing, i lied about both

What's the difference between and indian man and a barstool....... indians walked on the moon with a cow named chester.

Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew?... Never mind, that was a stupid question.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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