If life gives you lemons ask where they came from.

Why did the black guy jump over the fence ? The holocost.

This one time at band camp... I played an instrument and learned to march with the rest of my school's band.

Knock Knock Whose there? Boo I don't know anyone by the name of Boo. Go away

Why do people like anti jokes? Because their f****** funny as hell

What's black, white, has green stripes and smells like eggs? I don't know. That's why I'm asking.

Once there was an ugly barnacle. He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

What did one dog say to the other dog? Woof woof

why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

Who's black, white and Asian at the same time? A panda.

What did the dead person say? Nothing, dead people cant talk, coz they are dead

What did the bodybuilder do when someone stole his wallet? Ab workouts.

I am not Moral Man. Moral: FUUUUUUUUUUUU

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobel Nobel who? There was no bell, that's why I'm knocking you idiot

a man got hit by a truck in brooklyn, JK he got shot, he was in brooklyn, Duh, he stumbled out in to traffic afterwards

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The POLICE, now open the god damn door!

Patriarchy.

How do you like your eggs in the morning? -Poached or Fertilised?

Knock knock. Who's there? I don't know, i was wondering if you knew.

What did one baby say to the other? Nothing, they're both dead.

What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison? Unitelligent, because bison do not have the ability to purchase things with money so it will most likely just eat the money.

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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