Leslie's husband admitted to being gay, which came to the surprise of no one, seeing as Leslie is a man.

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Why can't Jimmy walk ever again? Because when he was 12 his father mistook him for a plank of wood a sawed his legs off. We may realise here that this prohibits him from walking.

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Anne frank dies days before camp was liberated.

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

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Why did the guy not pet the dog? He was allergic.

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Why did Justin Beiber fall out of a plane? Because i pushed him off

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What did the retard say to the other retard? *(incoherent gibberish)*

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Seriously tho, too much sex? I need to know dog.

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k

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs? A: Disabled.

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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Whats Black White and Red all over? oh, wait. what time were we supposed to meet that landlord?

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Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

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YEAH WELL SMELL YOUR BREATH U BELLEND

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had places to be

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What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

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A blind man walks past a fish market, pauses, takes in a big sniff, and says, "Good morning ladies!" to the women walking by wearing too much perfume.

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A chronic hemophiliac walks into a bar. He cuts his leg and bleeds to death.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A jew is a person contending to the faith of Judaism, and a pizza is an Italian flat normally round or square baked good consisting of dough, tomato sauce, cheese and various spices, and is sometimes enjoyed with toppings such as meat or vegetables.

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Yeah sure, you have "absolutely... ...No... ...Reason..." to... Fucking... use... This... place... at... all... But you seem to be here all the fucking time, what fucking sense does that make? That is not the matter at all fagface! Your fucking goons assaulting me because "I stole one of your aliases?" I was born Nero and will die fucking Nero, not Nerometal, not Nero of Neronism, just Nero your friendly rapist! Yeah Ill give you my fucking social info, so you... and... your... excessive... use... of... this shit... can... send... your ...fucking assholes to finish the job! Listen bitch! I am a writer! And your faggots stabbed off like half of my eyeball! I don't give a damn about this site, I want your fucking assholes to stop seeking me out in person! Hell, give me your social info, so we can "make a fucking settlement" Where I break off your head and shit down your neck!

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What do you call a cow climbing a tree? Amazing. How many cows have you seen climbing trees?

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I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

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Leave her alone...

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops