If Steve has 5 apples and gives Jenny 2, it is obvious they aren't eating oranges.

How do you get a clown to stop laughing? You throw an awe at it. Why did Sally fall off the swing? .....I missed the clown

Roses are red Violets are blue Goodbye to the people who hated on me

Ben Wuz here was the funniest Hahahahaha

Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

women's rights

Knock, knock. Who's there? Your parents are dead. And happy birthday!

Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

how do u kill a blonde: drop something shiny at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 2 blondes: but a mirror at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 3 blondes: ask which 1 of them is the prettiest and then wait 5 minuetes:)

Q: Whats worse than running out of hot water? A: having wyatt friedman poop on your chest, Hit him up on FB

A priest, a jew, and a pirate walk into a bar. An exchange of dialogue occurs with the bartender and hilarity ensues.

A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

how does wasabi stay open during summer because tiffany is a nice person

Inspirational story: There once was an ugly old man who was so ugly everyone died. The end -Matt

"What dosen't kill you makes you stronger" Except losing your arms.

What did you call something that is long, hard and full of seamen? A ship.

Knock knock who's there? the police, your under arrest the police your under arrest who? BAM! sir, I'm placing you under arrest for the murder of your wife, anything you say or do can be used against you. IT WASN'T ME!!!! yeah yeah tell it the judge

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs Mat

what did the frog say to the plane HE NO CRY SO I CRY FOR HIM

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? This joke.

What do you call a moose with a 42 gauge shotgun pellet through its head? Open Season

Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

Why did the boy with one arm have no friends? He was a cereal killer from Ireland.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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