A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

A man goes to the movies with his wife, two hours later they drive home and find their house just the way they left it.

What has two legs and can't walk. Someone thats paralyzed!

Throughout her entire pregnancy Sheniqua smoked, drank, and did many narcotic drugs such as heroin and cocaine. Why did she lose her baby before coming to term? Because I strangled her to death for being black.

People with cancer.

LeBron James proposes. So what does he put on the girls finger? Ben L.

What's 100 times worse that finding an worm in your Apple listening to Justin B. Sing! :-)

What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

What's the difference between a car tyre and 365 used condoms? One is a Goodyear. The others a fucking great year!!! San2

Why did the man put his money in the freezer? Perhaps he didn't believe in banks.

Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

What's the differnce of victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and others were raped then killed. Kelvin Yang.

Your momma is so fat that she decided to begin an exercise program and eat healthy and she lost weight.

What's worse than depression? Having depression and killing yourself

Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

What's blue paint and smells like red paint? Paints

I told my doctor I’m the first man on the face of the earth to suffer from morning sickness. He promptly corrected my mistake; my excessive vomiting is actually caused by chemo.

What do you call an African American woman with Tourettes? This question cannot be answered correctly. The African American woman was misdiagnosed. She is really a crack whore.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet, And so is she.

I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

What is better than a dead baby nailed to a tree? A dead baby nailed to 10 Trees.

And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

What is 9 inches long, the same colour as my skin, and makes my girlfriend gag when I shove it down her throat? Her Miscarriage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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