What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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A blind man walks into a bar No literally he does, he has a guide dog and everything, he's a capable member of society, don't be rude.

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what is purple and fly? - a purple flying.

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Did you ever notice that if you blow in a dogs face it goes mad, yet when you take him on a car ride he sticks his head straight out the window?

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my wife came out of the kitchen....

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What did the white man say to the group of black men when there was a golf ball coming at them? Stay there! You are in no immediate danger!

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What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

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What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

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Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

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so how about that irline food

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How many napkins does it take to tack to the moon? Purple, snakes don't have elbows

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Antoni Wilkinsin

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A rapist leaps out a woman and yells "surprise!" and proceeds to have non-consensual intercourse with her. Later, he is arrested by the police and charged with sexual assault.

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Roses are Gray, Violets are Gray, I am color-blind, I hate my life

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

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Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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New mission: refuse this mission

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A man was shot. He died.

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I had a submarine.... once

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Four blondes are driving to Disneyland, as they finally got to Florida, they read a sign that said "Disneyland: left" so they turned around and headed home.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so i can text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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