Guy: guess what girl: what Guy: nevermind girl: no what Guy: i love you girl:.. i love myself too..

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's Cheese on toast

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she was dead.

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What does it mean if you have 5$ and Chuck Norris has 5$? Congrats! You both have five dollars!

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you know what hurts, a revolver bullet in your brain.

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Yo momma is so fat, that after boarding an airplane the flight crew respectfully asked her to deboard, as with her on board the plane would be exceeding the reccomended weight, and thus be unable to fly safely.

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A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

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What did the Police Officer do after he made a positive identification of a Prostitute? He proceeded to pay her in cash for sexual favors because prostitution is legal in the state of Nevada

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How do you make Lady Gaga sad? You kill her family.

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What did the tree say to the boy? Nothing. As i recall, trees are unable to speak and or show signs of emotion.

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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Fun Fact: If you lay out all of the veins in your body out, You will die

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Q. Why did Steve Carell, the 40 year old virgin, fail to get laid? A. Erectile Dysfunctioning.

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile

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Why couldn't anybody at school taste lunch? Nobody made lunch.

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem makes no sense refrigerator.

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What's better then petting a lion? Petting a lion and not getting eaten

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what did the child say to his mother? daddy raped me!

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Why was the woman crying? Because I hit her with a bat.

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What's cool about a dead fish? Nothing.

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How do you wake up a black man? You stab him in the thigh.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

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...The new series of spinoff movies from the worlds most frightening franchise! Pretty Normal Activity: Doing the groceries *****-Did not scare me at all :D! Ballbusters movie rentals *****- The demon never showed up which made this the scariest movie ever! Could not sleep for months... Whatyumean there is nothing paranormal in this? Aww FU*beep*CK!! Sumgay Inthestreet Journal *****-Pissed myself just from hearing the title got a stroke and almost died!, was it another Paranormal movie you said? Most overhyped comment we could find. Goddamn exaggerated movie reviews that fooled me into buying the original and expect something actually scary :(

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* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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