Roses are red. Violets are red. Sunflowers are red. My garden is on fire.

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Why was the ginger angry with the manager of the hardware store? His smoke detector didn’t come with a snooze button.

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Have a nice day! Dont tell me what to do.

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Why was the baseball player happy? He got married.

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Adam Chebali has no life

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Hollywood presents: In a world... Where darkness and crime is at every corner... The governments darkest secret... MUST... BE... UNLEASHED! Jack Kirby: So, with this technology I can swallow criminals and gain their abilities? But is there not a lot wrong with this? Hollywood: Meh... Sorry, we are gonna go with The Fast and The Furious 64: Mario Kart style.

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I am aware that my positivity makes me do some bad mistakes, but if negativity is the alternative I will keep taking my chances.

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Whats worse than burning your foot? Getting it eaten off by a cannibal.

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._____________________. Whale!

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There once was a man from Nantucket Who was stung on the head by a wasp When asked if it hurt he replied, 'not a bit, and he could do it again if he'd like to.'

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I took your mother out for a classy steak dinner. I decided not to call her agian because we weren't very compatible and the conversation was very superficial.

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why did a girl walk down the alley? because her name was alley!

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How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

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what did the white man say to the mexican man when the mexican stepped in poop? you have poop on your toe

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a duck, a mexican, a camel, a jew, a duck, a moose, an asian, an ostrich, a turtle, an elephant, a scorpion, two vampires, a pokemon, your mom, Stephen Hawkings, a bird, a plane, mario, your family, and a plumber walk into a bar. They have cancer, AIDS, disabilties, diabetes, herpes, siezures, retardation, death in their families, drug addiction, no arms or legs, no home, no money, racial segregation, and have been raped. A combination of which is worse than the holocaust and three bee stings and a rope that fails.

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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joke under this line wins _________________________

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I like doodle. XoXo Jamie

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What did the young boy get his Father for Father's Day? A bouquet of flowers for his grave stone.

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Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? Being eaten by a giant octopus. What's worse than being eaten by a giant octopus? 3 Bee Stings!

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roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

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Have you heard of the lawnmower joke? (NO) Neither have I!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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