Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

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What did the cancer patient get for Christmas? Nothing, she didn't make it that far.

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Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a gun.

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What's wrong with a black man in a bar? Nothing, Except the fact that he is an alcoholic, and will probably beat his wife after drinking.

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What do you call a guy who accidentally cut off his hand in a blender? Stupid.

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Little Miss Muffett sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey along came her food allergies and she died

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why did the man die? he had cancer

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You're a country without the "tree". Did you just call me a cunt?

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock. whos there? not suzy.

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What's worse than finding a Holocaust in your apple? The worm

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How do you get your mom off a clown? hit your mom with an axe

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your mother is so fat that she bought a treadmill and uses it daily. she already lost 20 lbs.

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Why was the youtube like bar green? Because the graphics designer felt like making it green. =.=

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Whats green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

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What do You call a man with no arms or legs? Dead, He died of blood loss 3 hours ago

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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What's the best rabbit for a black person?

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Why is an elephant gray Because it's GRAY!!! duh

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what did the dog say to the mailman? woof.

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Q. What's a pirate's favorite type of movie? A. It depends on the individual pirate, although most modern-day pirates are from third world countries like Somalia and so are too poor to be able to watch many movies. Classical pirates like those depicted in Treasure Island or Pirates of the Carribean are, of course, from a period of history before movies had been invented, so couldn't possibly have had a favorite.

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Two flatfishes swam in a bathtub.

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" Whats the deal with airline food? " -Sharon

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How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

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If you have me you want to share me, if you share me you no longer have me. What am I? (a secrect)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops